My little guidebook for my groundbreaking brown sisters. p1
There are quite a few organizations out there that thrive on attracting diverse blood to bolster their the progressive brand, and to also perhaps advance social justice. Nothing wrong with that – these organizations can totally be a beneficial service to both you and the organization.
But, as a young Filipina working starting out as a civil servant, I started to reflect on some things that I wish I had some guidance on. They’re not usually included in any professional or leadership curriculum I’ve ever had. How do I “be professional” and navigate spaces that have historically and continue to exclude and diminish people -- poor people, people of color, women, queer folks, immigrants, or based off their religion, looks, or other beliefs?
How do I exist to transform a space, and not replicate systems of oppression? How do create a genuine, open, experience which is accepting of all parts of myself and not a shell of myself? Yes people, I’m talking about how do I deal with all the isms. If you have a distaste for those topics and you just eye rolled, fuck you, you’re a part of the problem.
How do I deal with heightened vulnerability in the workplace – physically and financially?
I’m wondering - How do I get shit done, but not take any bullshit?
Oh yes girl, THAT SHIT.
With the right tools, you can make it.
Here’s the training I wish I had, the basics. But you know. I guess you could argue I’m learning it anyways. “On the job training.”
1) How to call out oppression
Tactfully. Exactly. Timely. Sometimes, coupled with a solution.
It makes me anxious to think about it. But funny enough, I’m pretty sure some people think I actually love doing this. I fucking hate it. You think I like calling out that sexist shit at our board meeting? You think I like calling out how you completely disregarded a whole community of people in your program?
I don’t, but guess fucking what, I, by the grace of god, was born with this perpetual gift that keeps giving– the ability to “identify” certain fucked up things that are unfair. When I say “ability” I actually mean, in many situations, I’m the only person expected to do this. And when I say identify, I actually mean witness/sometimes experience.
So, then, this becomes really valuable workplace skill. So much so, that this should be on job descriptions, resumes and shit. But it isn’t. Buuuuttt it’s good skill to hone and practice.
A lot of times, I’ve found that I don’t call out oppression. I have to pick my battles because 1) energy 2) security. The hard part about not quite executing the “call out” with just enough tact, exactness, timeliness, etc. is potentially pretty bad consequences.
You can get fired. You can be labeled as angry. People may avoid you and withhold collaboration or other opportunities for your advancement. So you will need to balance that risk out.
And when a "call out” has been done well, you can really make a difference for all minorities in the workplace. And therefore, everywhere. You will be lauded. You will feel good about yourself for fighting for justice and shit. So here are my tips.
I had to unlearn a certain amount of politeness/fight my internal oppression. For example, it’s awkward to intervene when a man is raising his voice at woman. It might happen at the office, or somewhere else, like a restaurant. But it happens often. You may have been desensitized. It cuts into your reaction time. But when that shit he is doing is unnecessary, CALL THAT SHIT OUT. Remember, to be successful, you need to be timely. If you miss your chance, you’ll probably revisit the situation in your mind later wishing you had done something. That painful quiet suffering you will have and will get to know well, token.
Second, is this oppression expressed right now in an interpersonal way or a systemic way? If this is a systemic issue – for example, while your "relationship" with your boss is fine, but your white male coworkers do exactly the same shit as you and your woc female colleagues, but the white men get paid 38% more than you, you should definitely pursue correcting this injustice. CALL THAT SHIT OUT. Offer a Solution – ask to understand your level of compensation with the information you have. Maybe make the case for a raise. It’s also becoming more popular for HR to analyze pay equity, if you are in the position to recommend that be done, do it. However if you are faced with an interpersonal situation that may not be perceived as blatantly racist, sexist, homophobic, etc. your “call out” may be more open for interpretation, if you know what I mean. The reactionary follow up is usually a blend of “I’m not racist, or that’s not racist, how?” It takes a lot of energy to discuss when you are questioned. And you better know your shit. If you can’t explain what’s up clearly, be prepared for more questioning of your judgment in the future. This is just something I keep in mind, to help me pick battles.
Are you being asked to provide a service with out fair compensation because of your minority identity, like free translation? Are you or someone getting ripped off or violated in some sinister/illegal way? DON’T TAKE THAT BULLSHIT, FIGHT BACK.
Is this person your superior? Be cautious, but if it’s fucked up, don’t ignore. You are not obligated to call things out. But I know that you probably want to. It's not going to be easy. I know it's never really elegant when I have to. So if you do, these are just my tips. Just remember, Be Tact, Be Exact, Be Timely, and sometimes Offer a Solution. And as fucking dumb and unnecessary as it is, you can probably throw smile in there. It can add to your security.
2) Cultural Humility
When I was in college there was this term that was often used – cultural competency. I’m not going to critique any curriculum and I'm not an expert on these terms, but I want to comment on the word “competency.” While there should definitely be greater emphasis in our society given to learning and deliberately engaging with the multitude of cultures in our world, there is no way that anyone should know everything about every culture. I think this is where I’ve had to encounter awkward white racial anxiety, and also my own racial anxieties as an Asian person.
My friend who is a nurse mentioned to me she was taught cultural humility in her training. She said the focus is on being open and willing to learn about the other another person’s culture and way of life, understanding that it may be unlike your own and that difference should not keep you from working together. Same concept as we learn in cultural competency, but the word humility captures the idea so much better!
We will never be fully cross-culturally “competent.” Ironically, I think understanding that is kind of exactly the basic thing anyone needs to know in order to even try to be “culturally competent.”
So this I what it looks like. Maybe it’s this idea of “competency” that leads to people thinking that they actually know certain shit about me when they don’t know me. It gives credit to people for already knowing things when they recognize a culture other than their own. It’s like when someone knows the names of some Peruvian dish because they dated someone who was Peruvian once. Then they expect to receive some sort of social credit for it.
I make the same mistakes. Practicing greater humility would have saved me from many hurtful moments and moments of embarrassment.
I think idea of cultural humility gives the most importance to the need to exercise respect and dignity, which is really the point in trying to encourage anti-racist behavior. When I take the time to have a learning moment diplomatically with someone unlike me, that’s when I deserve the brownie point. If you have to talk about stereotypes , which is a favorite topic of conversation of those who don’t normally “think about race” a great phase for your disposal is Cultural Humility. It gets across the point and soft enough that you won’t appear angry.
I just wanted to touch on a couple of topics for now. I'll keep adding thoughts to this guidebook as it comes. What do you think? Until the next post!
